


Talk

by wonwoozi



Category: GOT7, JJ Project
Genre: High School, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Nihilism, Religious Discussion, Smoking, fake deep jaebum whos actually kinda real deep, jinyoung who loves people, like incredibly mild
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-07
Updated: 2016-01-07
Packaged: 2018-05-12 04:02:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5651776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wonwoozi/pseuds/wonwoozi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The one where Jinyoung's hobby is people and Jaebum piques his interest.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Talk

**Author's Note:**

> _"All I wanna do is talk,_  
>  _but seeing you fucks me up"_  
>  \- Talk, Big Deal
> 
> just to clarify - 'fag' in british slang means cigarette, idk if it does in other places, but just thought id mention that

Jinyoung loves people. He loves them, people of all backgrounds, races, genders, status, morality, he can’t help but love humanity even if sometimes he hates it.

Ever since he was young he’s been preoccupied with the concept of human beings coexisting, working together despite their differences to make a system function. He stares at people a lot, sometimes when he’s on the train, sometimes when he’s on the bus. He just finds it fascinating. Every single person is an individual just like him, with their own opinions and thoughts and likes and dislikes. There are people who do terrible things and people who do great things and it’s weird to think about what sets them apart, why they make such different decisions, what their reasons are. But sometimes, Jinyoung concludes, not everyone has a reason.

 

Since growing up in a large city, Jinyoung has been surrounded by people, and though he keeps to himself most of the time, he can’t help but wonder who else is out there. People don't usually dislike Jinyoung, but he thinks most people find his way of thinking a little unorthodox and strange. He's pretty certain he’s never going to meet somebody who shares his interest, who thinks the same way he does, who takes a big step back and looks at the whole picture- that is, until he meets Im Jaebum.

 

He doesn’t realise it at first, because Jaebum has never even batted an eyelash in his direction the whole time they’ve been at school together. Jaebum comes in 10 minutes late for registration every day, backpack slung lazily over his shoulder and large black boots leaving scuff marks on the floor. It’s always the same, Jinyoung’s never noticed it any different, and he wonders why. Why is Jaebum never on time? Why is he never 20 minutes late? What does he think about when he goes home? Or when the teacher hands him another detention slip?

Jinyoung can’t say he’s paid an immense amount of attention towards Jaebum but he finds him intriguing, intriguing enough to take note.

He eyes the little anarchist badge on Jaebum’s backpack, it’s new, and he smiles because everybody, even Im Jaebum, has an interest in something. He’s unsurprised that Jaebum would take an interest in political ideology, what with his incredible talent during debates in class and his great rejection of authority, but he does find it interesting.

 

Jinyoung’s interested in plenty of people throughout the school, from teachers who seem to project their insecurities onto young students, to the lady in the canteen that keeps a picture of her child in the locket around her neck. Really, with the way he looks at things, he should probably be plagued with existential anxiety but for some reason he isn’t, and never has been. He doesn’t feel like he needs a greater purpose to enjoy being alive, the world has no purpose, and that’s why people make them up. Human’s in general cannot seem to cope with the idea that they are fundamentally unimportant to everything in the grand scheme of things and so they dedicate their lives to research or politics or love or stamp collecting. It’s part of what gets Jinyoung so excited about _people._

 

Jinyoung's listening to his music so loudly, he almost doesn’t hear Jaebum talk to him while riding the school bus home.

“Huh?” He frowns, yanking out an earbud.

“Is this seat taken?” Jaebum repeats unimpressed, pointing to the space next to Jinyoung where he had unceremoniously dumped his bag.

“Oh! Uh, no, sorry.” Jinyoung mumbles as he grabs his satchel and pulls it onto his lap. Jaebum just sits down next to him without a word and pulls out his headphones. Jinyoung tries his best not to watch him, worried about creeping him out, but he can’t help glancing down at his hands. They’re large but against all odds, his fingers are rather slender. His knuckles look somewhat bruised, and his middle and forefingers are decorated with worn-out looking rings, though Jinyoung can imagine they were once very shiny.

“Quit staring at my hands.” He hears Jaebum say and he quickly reels his eyes in, opting to stare down the back of the seat directly in front of him instead.

 

He doesn’t talk to Jaebum for a while after that, the two hardly crossing paths outside of the classroom, but Jinyoung still thinks about his bruised knuckles and how they came to be. He’s out on one of his usual night time walks, his parents hardly give a damn, they know he’s responsible, and he can feel the rain start to drizzle. Usually he doesn’t mind the rain but he’s not a huge fan of being _in_ it, generally preferring to watch it through a glass window. He continues to walk though, plugged into his music and following a crowd through busy streets, feeling a little dysfunctional and separate from everybody else. It’s nice.

 

He’s walking past a bar, its neon sign glaring at him under the dark of the sky, when he hears the familiar voice.

“What the fuck? You’re _seriously_ kicking me out?!”

He turns his head and spots Jaebum furiously arguing with a large man whose arms are littered with tattoos. He watches for a minute until Jaebum storms off, kicking over the menu board as he does. Jinyoung follows after him, maybe just to check he’s okay, or maybe because he’s not quite in control of himself, he can’t decide which it is.

He finds Jaebum sat on a bench exhaling smoke, a burning cigarette between his fingers. The exhaust leaks out of it in one untamed stream, darting to and fro whenever the wind picks up. He notices he’s staring again.

“What do you want?” Jaebum asks, looking over at him with a cold expression, his jaw set rock hard.

“I just thought I should check if you were okay. I saw you having a row with that guy and-”

“I’m fine.” He answers with a shrug, taking another drag of his cigarette. It stinks, Jinyoung can smell it from here, and it reminds him of his uncle’s house. He’s only ever smoked a cigarette once in his life and it made his fingers go numb. He still remembers practically coughing up a lung too, much to his cousins’ entertainment.

“Why were your hands bruised?” Jinyoung can’t help asking, even though he realises how awkward this is. Jaebum simply exhales, smoke pouring out of his nostrils like some fire breathing dragon.

“I like to punch stuff.” He explains before stubbing out the cigarette on the sole of his boot.

Jinyoung nods slowly.

“What’s your name?” Jaebum asks him and Jinyoung’s a bit taken aback, but not in a bad way.

“Jinyoung.”

Jaebum repeats it to himself under his breath and stands up, stretching his arms out. The rain is still going but it’s so light it’s hardly noticeable.

“You want a fag?” Jaebum asks, holding out his box of smokes, something Jinyoung suspects is a friendly gesture. He shakes his head though.

“No thanks. My dad calls them coffin nails.” He says simply, earning a weird look from Jaebum, but he doesn’t miss the small smile that comes with it.

“You’re weird, Jinyoung.” Jaebum sighs, reaching a hand out to ruffle Jinyoung’s damp hair. And with that, he leaves. Just gets up and goes. Jinyoung stares after him for a moment or two before continuing with his walk. Somehow his focus has been thrown way off.

 

Jinyoung sighs as the teacher stands in front of him, writing up a detention slip.

“If you want to skip classes, Mr.Park,” She says, ripping it out and handing it to him. “Don’t get caught.”

When he walks into the classroom after school and spots Jaebum at the very back, he’s far from surprised. There’re a few other kids strewn about the place but they all seem to be avoiding each other like the plague, judging by the rows of empty chairs and desks dividing them all. He takes a seat by the window and peers outside, watching the large gaggles of teens fleeing the school grounds. Friday detentions were the worst.

 

When they’re finally free to go, Jinyoung finds himself hovering by his desk, like he’s waiting for something.

“You don’t have to wait for me you know.” Jaebum tells him as he walks past and immediately Jinyoung follows after.

“You take the same bus as me right?” He asks, falling into step next to Jaebum. Really, it should be awkward and tense because they aren’t exactly friends, but it’s not and Jinyoung likes that.

Jaebum nods.

“Yeah, sometimes.”

“Are you taking it today?”

He nods again.

 

They end up sitting next to each other on the bus- or at least Jinyoung ends up settling himself down next to Jaebum.

“No offence but why do you keep talking to me?” Jaebum’s voice doesn’t sound malicious but it’s not exactly warm and inviting either.

“I find you interesting, I guess.” Jinyoung shrugs. Jaebum blinks but doesn’t say anything as he turns back to face the front.

“I like your anarchist badge.” Jinyoung points to it and notices that some of the red has chipped away at the side. Jaebum glances at him from the corner of his eye.

“Are you into anarchy, then?” He queries. Jinyoung thinks about it for a moment and nods.

“Sure. I’m into ideologies of all kinds, they’re cool to learn about, but I don’t know a huge amount about anarchism specifically.”

“Well I could explain it to you, if you want?”

Jinyoung smiles, taking pride in the way Jaebum’s eyes light up. Everybody has interests, even Im Jaebum.

 

Jinyoung’s sat on the floor of Jaebum’s garage, watching Jaebum repeatedly hit a punching bag with a baseball bat. This is probably the fourth time they’ve hung out since the bus ride and slowly but surely Jaebum’s been opening up to him. He loves to ask him questions and he loves to listen to the answers, enjoying the way the words pour out of Jaebum’s mouth like a stream of consciousness.

 

“So what do you like about anarchy so much?” Jinyoung pries, watching as Jaebum strikes the large bag of sand again. He drops the bat to his side and grabs a bottle of water, sitting down opposite Jinyoung, his black hair sticking to his forehead a little, slick with sweat.

“I like the lack of authority.” Jaebum states it like it’s obvious, which Jinyoung supposes it is. “Think about it. Every person is born equal and all that shit, right?”

Jinyoung nods.

“So why do a small governing body get to dictate what everybody else can and can’t do? I can’t think of one government that doesn’t abuse its power whatsoever.” He says and Jinyoung can see that fire in his eyes again.

“Even if a government is democratically elected, there will always be people dissatisfied, there will always be people unrepresented. Most democracies are flawed as it is so how can anybody have a true, legitimate authority? The answer is they can’t. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think people should have to fend for themselves, I'm a huge supporter of welfare, but as soon as you draw the line between the state and the electorate, there’s already a power imbalance, a hierarchy. And I think that’s kinda fucked up. No politician has more of a right to bomb a country than I do, no country has more of a right to wage war than another country, the issue is that people see themselves as different to everyone else, when really we’re all the same deep down. There’s no absolute morality, y’know? It’s all imaginary but we believe in it so much that we feel we have the right to divide and segregate in the name of what we believe. It’s a load of bullshit to me.”

Jinyoung can feel himself grinning widely as he lies on his back and stares at the roof of the garage, studying the paint splats left there by lazy decorators. Jaebum really is something.

“Do you believe in God?” He asks, not looking up at Jaebum, but curious about the answer.

Jaebum chuckles and Jinyoung notices he’s also lying down now, an unlit cigarette perched between his lips.

“Not really. But I wish I did.”

“Why’s that?” Jinyoung cocks his head.

“Cause it sounds more peaceful. I’m a bit of a nihilist, truth be told, and I’m not sure if I’m a pessimistic one or an optimistic one. Either way I think that it’s just so fucking _human_ for religion to exist. What would the point in life be without a set of pearly white gates, y'know? So even though I don’t think I have a final destination, or that what I do really matters, I understand why people are religious and I kind of want that for myself. I dunno if that makes sense…” His words trail off as he lights his cigarette and inhales deeply. Exhaling, he nudges Jinyoung’s leg with his foot.

“What about you?”

Jinyoung lies in silence, looking for an answer.

“I guess I’m agnostic. I don’t know if there’s a deity out there, don’t care all that much either, and if there is I’m not sure I’d worship it.”

He hears Jaebum’s half laugh, the one he does when he hears or sees something he likes.

“That’s such a Jinyoung answer to give.” He says and Jinyoung feels a warmth growing in his chest, spreading through his body and heating up his cheeks. It’s nice to be with somebody else for once, instead of in his own head. It’s nice to be with a person instead of studying one.

“Are your family religious?” Jaebum asks him, blowing a puff of smoke up to the ceiling where it vanishes out the window.

“Yeah. Well my dad doesn’t practice that much but mother is pretty orthodox. She’s alright about it in general but the gay rights argument gets tiring.”

Jaebum quirks a brow.

“She’s a homophobe?”

“Sort of. She’s one of those people who claims they don’t hate gay people but that they think it’s unnatural. I’m over it though, she doesn’t need to know about my sexuality, and I’ll be out of her hair someday soon anyway.”

Jaebum switches the subject.

“Have you ever had sex?” It’s a personal question but Jinyoung’s not embarrassed to answer.

“Nah, not all the way.”

“But you’ve done _stuff_?” He prompts, wiggling his brows. Jinyoung kicks Jaebum lightly but smiles.

“Yeah. What about you?”

“Yea, I’ve done the nasty. It’s pretty fun but it’s not for everyone.”

Jinyoung sees Jaebum put out his cigarette.

“If you don’t mind me asking, with a boy or a girl?”

“Both.” Jaebum replies.

“Nice.” Jinyoung comments, shutting his eyes.

“You should let me do you sometime, you’re cute.”

The way Jaebum says it so offhandedly makes Jinyoung’s ears burn but he loves it, he loves that Jaebum is the kind of person to say that kind of thing so offhandedly.

“We’ll see.”

 

They lie there in silence until neither of them knows the time, just listening to the rain patter on the metal roof. Jaebum has long since closed the window and Jinyoung finds his mind running again. 

“Do you listen to pretentious music?” He doesn’t know when to stop asking questions, it’s like Jaebum is this big treasure chest of knowledge and he wants to steal as much treasure as he can, while he can. Jaebum’s laughter is loud and Jinyoung’s glad he’s not getting sick of it.

“I’m not sure, you tell me. I listen to a lot of different kinds of music.” He answers and Jinyoung can hear the smile in his voice. He wishes Jaebum would smile more, he never does it at school, but it’s almost contagious.

“What kinds?”

“Classical, hip-hop, alternative, pop punk, pop rock, punk rock, punk, instrumental, jazz, blues, electropop, metal, basically anything that isn’t operatic or country.”

Jinyoung raises his eyebrows in surprise.

“Woah, that’s pretty unexpected.”

“What, did you expect me to only listen to The Smiths or something?”

Jinyoung giggles.

“Yeah, something like that.”

“Well I guess you can’t judge a book by it’s cover.”

“You can never judge a book by it’s cover.” Jinyoung agrees. People are complicated and nuanced, he knows that, and he loves that about them. Jinyoung loves people, he loves them, but he thinks that maybe Jaebum might be his favourite person. 

**Author's Note:**

> thank u for reading!!! sorry for posting a lot recently, im just writing shitty ficlets to put off doing schoolwork lmao, i hope this was ok?? anyway thank u!


End file.
